As my inaugural post here at the Femme Guide, I want to introduce myself...Hi! I'm Roxy Harte, erotica writer...lol. More seriously though, my goal as a fiction writer is to challenge the way people think, change their prejudices, and trample all over their boundaries. I write GLBT and BDSM erotica...usually combining the two...
This post may be offensive to some people, not because I've included adult-material excerpts (which undoubtedly will find their way into future posts), but because when it comes to my authenticity, I'm fairly vocal...
I know who I am, a bisexual Femme. I've known since my "Epiphany Day" during an ordinary Jr. High gym class in 1978 when Amie R stripped down to her skin for showers and I tripped over my jaw (which had hit the ground.) How many times had I showered naked with the other girls and not "noticed"? I was in utter and total lust.
And it was noticed.
After that, I was the outcast, the queer girl no one wanted to talk to...and after a decade of being in the "In" crowd, that hurt. But as I sat with the Principal and the female gym teacher in a conference with my parents, I refused to renounce my stance that I was Bisexual...even after counseling to dispel my confusion. The consequence was showering solo (before the other girls through Jr High and after the other girls through High School) because no one wanted a fag in the shower room. (It was 1978...)
I made a stand at thirteen.
I've been challenged ever since.
Lesbians try to convince me I just haven't met the right woman yet; heterosexual men try to convince me I haven't met the right man yet...or beg to watch.
Please, believe me when I say Bisexuality is real! Ask anyone who identifies as bisexual. There is not an on-off switch. There is no way to ever be 100% heterosexual or 100% homosexual. And I'm not sure about anyone else, but given the choice to be 100% anything...I wouldn't take it. Partly, because I am really comfortable with who I am, even if I tend to make everyone else a little crazy. But partly because I feel like "my world view, my sexuality" is superior. Now, don't get all in a tissy (I already explained that I tend to make people crazy...that includes rage at my opinions).
Here's what I mean...I don't think I'm better than anyone else...just a bit more evolved. I'm not trying to fit into a gender (I identify as masculine and feminine under different situations) and I'm not trying to be either straight or gay because I've already accepted that I'm neither...and so there is no prejudice, no anger, no frustration. I am who I am and I totally accept that you are who you are because I know that whether you are gay or straight, bi or transgender...that's who you are. I can't and wouldn't want to "fix" me, so why on earth would I want to "fix" you? That's it...that's my attitude. Why can't everyone else be so kind?
I lust after men, I lust after women...I've even fallen in love with a few of each. So get over it already. Accept me for who I am.
Sometimes, I meet other bisexuals who are afraid to "come out of the closet" because they've been identified as straight or queer so long by people in their sphere that to suddenly say I might want to be with x instead of y for a while would topple their world...and most of them want to know how I'm brave enough to just be myself. Honestly, I don't know that it's bravery. It's a refusal to lie.
I have a lesbian friend who assumed I was lesbian and struggling to "come out" because I was dating a man at the time, but I clearly wasn't a heterosexual female...I told her I was Bi...she actually held her finger to her lips and shushed me. She didn't want her partner to hear the word Bi because her partner, as a very Butch, very opinionated lesbian in the community, might "go off".
Seriously?
I didn't get it...
"Because you can't make up your mind," she said. "You're afraid to come out of the closet and that makes you a clit tease."
My friend and her partner then got a dose of MY SOAPBOX...
So, for anyone who still thinks that bisexuality isn't real or needs personal affirmation. Here are a few links to various places of interest(I have dozens so if Google doesn't quench your thirst for more info...I'm sure I'll be blogging again and will be supplying more as the mood hits me.
If you are bisexual or know of other bisexual sites please feel free to comment...
