Well, it’s about that time of the year. The time of the year when the year ends. 2008 has had its ups and downs, but above all it has been a year of great change. Political and socioeconomic change – do I even have to mention that whole first black U.S. President bit? – but also a time of personal change. 2008 marks the year I discovered and entered the world of kink and BDSM. It marks the year I really began to explore my gender identity and sexuality. I came out as a kinky switch. I came out as pansexual, finally settling on queer because it just seems to suit me so much better. (I don’t think I ever actually blogged about settling on queer. There’s another New Year’s resolution: blog more!) I came out as femme.

Now to me, that’s the biggie. I had been experimenting with my sexuality for quite some time. Probably since I was 12 and first realized I was attracted to more than just guys. But experimenting with my gender identity – now that’s something that never even occurred to me until I started reading the blogs of people far more enlightened than I. It never occurred to me, even though I grew up as a tomboy, no girly girl by any means, that I could be anything but what I have now learned is called cis-female. That was a huge revelation.

It is now a goal. My big goal for 2009, aside from not being such a half assed blogger, is to really delve deep into the caverns of my femme-ininity and map every niche, stalactite, stalagmite, trench and crevasse. To test the waters of the underground streams and rivers that have shaped me. And while I’m doing that, I’m going to celebrate it and play with it. What is the point of such a glorious thing as femme-ininity if a femme can’t enjoy it, am I right?

This new year is positively brimming with possibility. I for one am eager to seize it in both hands, wrap myself in it and let it carry me away into an eyes-wide-open life.

Oh, and did I mention it will also be my birthday? Happy 22^nd to me!

Latest posts by Danni St Athens

• The Unfortunate Tale of a Femme and a Vest - August 14th, 2011
• Tomboy Femme: Achieving Solidarity - July 2nd, 2011
• Tomboy Femme: An Introduction - June 2nd, 2011
• Reader Question: Being a Femme's Femme - July 10th, 2010
• On Being a Femme in Pursuit - June 24th, 2010