Prompted in part by a post from Ms. Hinterland where she mentioned her first pair of heels, and then even further inspired by finding the CUTEST new shoes today, that were on sale for $10 regularly $60 (‘Sugar shoe’ black mary janes with a crazy floral print, and a thick chunky 2 inch heel) I started thinking about shoes and femmeness and the first pair of shoes I remember owning that made me feel like a femme.
Most of my childhood was spent desperately attempting (and horribly failing) to be a tomboy. I was really really bad at it, but I desperately wanted to succeed. In retrospect I know a big part of that was that I wanted the cute tomboys to notice me, and the other part was that I lived with my sexually abusive stepfather and I saw the adoption of masculinity as a way to protect myself, and that femininity was vulnerable (but that’s a whole different story).
In seventh grad my stepfather was only in the home on weekends and I began for the fist time really playing with femininity. The excessive flamboyant femininity that I began playing with was fun, intense, and eccentric. In many ways it’s similar to the style of femme I would come to claim a decade later. One outfit that I remember in particular was something I put together for Easter- a lime green silky dress that snapped up the front, black and white checkered tights and neon orange vinyl heeled sandals! I thought I was hot stuff, and those shoes were the first heels I ever owned and coincidentally the first shoes that made me feel * really * femme.
Now I’m the first to admit that a femme is a femme no matter what ze is wearing, and that as someone with knee problems I’m just as femme in my crazy colored super sassy sneakers (goddess I love living in a city with a sneaker culture) as I am in heels HOWEVER, there is something special about some shoes. Those orange platforms in seventh grade were a pair, my black kitten heals with hearts cut out (that appear on the front of my memoir) are another, as are my hot pink vinyl pointy-toed flats with rainbow trim, and these new floral mary janes are added to that list as well. What shoes are really special to you as a femme?
Latest posts by Sassafras
- Farewell - May 1st, 2011
- Persistence: All Ways Butch and Femme - April 16th, 2011
- Little Red Writing Dress - March 27th, 2011
- Unexpected Butch/Femme Poetry - March 22nd, 2011
- Tell-tale Signs a Queer Femme is Queer - March 4th, 2011
I have a pair of fuschia suede peep toe hidden platform heels that, whenever I put them on, I just feel like such a femme! So glamorous - I can't wait to pile on black eyeliner and match my lipstick shade to the shoes!
Love this post!
Oooh! Love talking some shoes! I just bought a pair of black leather platform, 5" spike heel, ankle strap peep toe pumps. . .I'm saving them for when my special someone takes me to my first play party/swinger bar. . . grin.
Ms. Hinterland’s last blog post..Heels: I Love Them
[...] hear me roar. I recently discovered the Femme’s Guide to Everything and Saturday there was a post about a woman’s first pair of shoes in which she felt femme. She was a teenager, and they were orange vinyl heeled sandals. My own particular version of femme [...]
These lime green sandleflats I got about 2 years ago from Rainbow, (clothing store.)The funny thing is, I didn't really like them at 1st, (the color.)but I liked the style, not sure how to describe. But anyways got them because they were on sale. They stayed in my closet for a month til I saw that they matched my favorite new blue and green skirt. (like perfect match!) so...I wore the skirt and sandles with a blue cami,(and a green cami in a smaller size underneath.) some funky jewelry, my fave summery perfume (Tangerine Spice, from Bath and Body Works, which they no longer make. *pouts*) And I thought I was looking sssseeexxxyyy as hell! lol.